After reading a response on FB, I thought about the sermon from Sunday. I have to admit, I'm not a fan of joint services but this particular one was rather enjoyable. When our pastor talked about our attitude in giving, something clicked and that thing that was troubling me the day before was finally put to rest. We give not because we can or because we have an abundance of something. Rather, we give because we too were in need when God reached out to us. It made so much sense. Our offering should not be an obligation nor is it charity. It's about compassion and empathy. We love because God first loved us.
Let me explain what was troubling me from the day before and how it all connects. We were on our way home from Calgary when we stopped at Gasoline Alley for pit-stop and gas. I was still half asleep as I waddled in to find the washroom. I was looking through the munchies section as I waited my turn and almost got bumped into by this little girl. She was cute but her mom was telling her other daughter to watch over her while she looked at her phone. It was on speaker playing some sort of waiting music. As I walked passed them towards the bathroom, I heard her mutter something like, "I knew I should've transferred money before I left". After I finished, I decided to get a chocolate bar for the ride home. As I made my decision and finish paying, the lady was still there with her phone, pacing around the gas station and muttering to herself. "What a bad day..." As I hopped into our car, I put two and two together and told hubby I think the lady inside has trouble paying for her gas.
"The one with the white matrix?" He got out of the car and checked their amount for me, "40 bux." I normally don't have cash with me but I remembered I had $40 tucked away in my wallet that day. I felt an urge inside, tugging at me to go back in. So I quickly grabbed my wallet and headed back in, feeling a little awkward. I didn't really know what to say so I turned to the cashier and asked if everything was ok. He appeared just as awkward as I and muttered there was something wrong with her debit account. I turned to the lady and asked how much she owed. "39 dollars", she replied sheepishly. Not knowing what to say next, I reached into my wallet, and put the $40 on the counter. "I feel so bad..." she said. I put my arm on her shoulder and gave her a quick squeeze. I told her not to feel bad and I can't even remember what else I said other than "Have a happy thanksgiving!" on my way out the door.
I couldn't stop thinking about them the whole night. I had replayed the situation in my head over and over. Should I have taken the chance to chat with her? Maybe I should've said something like, "Jesus loves you!" I just felt like I could've done more. What are the chances that you get a perfect opportunity to do something nice like that? Great chance to evangelize, no? And I didn't even mention God or anything! That was when the sermon hit me. We give because we too were in need when God reached out. I saw that the lady was in need and felt compelled to offer what I could. As I sat there in the pew, I felt God was telling me that I did the right thing. I know if I were in that lady's position, I too wouldn't be able to bring myself to ask a stranger for help. If I'm feeling embarrassed and desperate, the best thing someone can do is to simply help - no questions asked.
Sometimes there is no need to smother people with the good news every chance we get. Sometimes we don't need to give and expect people to listen to us in return. Sometimes, we just need to simply love our neighbours and let that be enough.
Happy Thanksgiving! :)
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